Do You Have a Trusted Advisor?
post # 377 — May 16, 2007 — a Client Relations post
Among the topics that I still speak (and consult) about regularly is that of being a trusted advisor to one’s clients (the topic of my co-authored 2000 book.)
I think that one of the reasons that interest in the topic doesn’t seem to diminish is that true trusted advisors seem to still be scarce.
As a test of this, I ask my audiences what I ask YOU now: Is there anyone you have hired who serves as your trusted advisor?
If the answer is yes, I’m (eternally) curious about two things. First, what are the specific kinds of things they do (or did) that made you accept them as your trusted advisor? (I know the theory — I’m interested in YOUR real world practical experience.)
Second, I’ll be curious to find out which practitioners (in general) seem to have earned trusted advisor status most frequently. Has it been it your doctor, lawyer, accountant, broker, consultant, PR person or some other?
Maybe I’ll sneak in a third question to solicit your input: as time goes by, are you finding it easier or harder to find professionals you trust?
Jim said:
So my first offer on this subject I first learned from one of my personal trusted advisors. Trust has two parts: trust in intention and trust in competence. I learned that from Jerry Weinberg – a guy I listen to very carefully all the time, who’s advice I take some of the time.
That leads to the second thought. A trusted advisor is conditional, depending on context. Sometimes someone’s agenda may not line up with mine. Sometimes it will. Sometimes someone’s skills may line up with the problem at hand. Sometimes they won’t, as with my parents when I was pursuing higher education. I was naive and incompetent to work the system. They were incompetent to help me work the system. Our intentions had little to do with it. A third consideration is resources. My favorite advisor may be crazy right now – it happens to the best of them. Maybe they stubbed their toe. Maybe they were trapped on a JetBlue flight for three or four days (thus confessing any number of terrorist activities they had nothing to do with, just to Make It Stop, but I digress.)
That last is often the most important consideration. Under stress many times someone’s brains go running out their ears. Your mother can’t always give you the best advice because she so wants you to be OK (for many but not all mothers out there.) She’s too wrapped up in the situation given her intentions to use her competence. Virginia Satir – another one of my trusted advisors, unfortunately for me second hand – called this high potential or high pot. A lot of advice is hard to take in if you are too beat down. That’s actually just an effective and important mechanism wired in to us. When you’re not set up so your brain can work well, fall back to habit, and look to protect yourself. Take chances when you have all your resources handy.
posted on May 18, 2007